Living Wicked

Posts Tagged ‘minka kelly’

I Have 2 of These Already …

Mar 7, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, Random

Wanna know reason #8 why I am awesome?

Because 1 day I am going to be nominated and chosen for an Academy Award. You don’t believe me?

Read and learn.

One of my books, probably SC is going to get recognized and made into a screenplay. Then it will go to an independent film festival. Critics will rave about it. Then it will be made into a Motion Picture. There will be controversy.

But, it will receive an Oscar Nod.

And then, I will get all dolled and D will get all G’d up from the feet up … we will walk the red carpet … Tarable and the kids will be in the audience with me …

… And the award for “Best Screenplay” goes to : WICKEDCOURTNI !!!!!!!!!!

I just made a believer out of you. In less than 100 words.

Anyway, I will get called up there and I will totally act surprised when really, I knew I was gonna beat out the “competition” in the first place.

See? Surprised.

Anyway. I would act all prepared on the outside but would be freaking the hell out on the inside. But I would have a speech prepared. Not the full 2 minutes, because I know I will stutter and pause and lose my place a couple of times … and God forbid *I* be the one to get the cut off music played when I am not finished speaking.

But I would have to thank people. Important people.

Like The Academy. (Because I heard, if you don’t thank them … you get black balled from EVER receiving a nod again or some shit.)

I would thank the years of sex, some breathtaking … some … well … fucking pathetic.

I would also thank Minka Kelly for playing the part of Julia. This role will define her career.

I would thank cocaine. Because, well … it is a hell of a drug. Or *was* anyway.

I would thank all of the prostitutes in the world because they were my muse … and who’s lifestyle I have a weird obsession about.

I would also thank my family … my D … all of the people who told me that the book was good even when it probably still needed work.

And then I would say something really profound and funny and start crying as if I won the Best Motion Picture award or something.

And I would be FB’ing from my iphone the entire 3 hours. Because I am THAT girl.

Who would you thank in your acceptance speech?

Tags: acadamy awards, minka kelly, Submissive Confessions, the oscar's

YGWM & Friday Eye Candy

Jan 22, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, Etc., Family, Friday Eye Candy, P.O.E. Biz, The Tarably Wicked Show, This Thing Called Marriage., You've Got Wicked Mail

WAZZZZZZZZUP!!!!!!!!!!! TGIMFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No bullshit, I am 1) Glad that it is Friday. 2) Glad that it is the weekend. 3) Glad that it is Open Letter FUCKING FRIDAY!

Dear New Piercing(s),

Fucking HEAL already.

Love Tarable & Wicked

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Dear D,

Bllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (breath) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (breath)
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Fine. Fucking fine. FINE.

Courtni.

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Dear Stupid Boy,

You are fucking STUPID. I just wanted to you to know.

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Dear JWow and Snook’s,

We are your West Coast soul sistahs. We would beat any bitches ass or even a dudes if he pressed the right buttons. It is like the East and West ATeam. Or really the Bteam. B= Bitches.

Yeeeeah.

Tarably Wicked.

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Dear Jamie,

If the open letter isn’t signed … then I wrote it.

Love Wicked.

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Dear Tarable,

I gotcho back. Always.

Love, Your Bestie

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Dear Jersey Shore,

Why are you so addicting?!

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Dear You,

I appreciate you. Love you, mean it.

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Dear Emotions,

Why? Why do you have to come out at the most inopportune time? Why do you have tear ducts? Like at work when you are looking at yourself in the mirror … or when you are talking to your bestie and she realizes that you are crying and she asks you as you are crying and when she asks you, you cry harder? Why ruin your makeup? Why?

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Dear Friday’s,

We have 60 of you that are just to ourselves. We vow to do really awesome stuff together and without boys or kids or drama filled people. Just us. A bestfrienddate.

Love TarablyWicked

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Dear 2/12,

You have been scheduled as our bestfriendvalentinesdayfridaydate. We are gonna kick it and get drunk and watch a funny movie. The end of that.

TarablyWicked

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Dear Snookin for Love,

Really?!

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Dear Credits,

Fucking get bought. K?!

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Dear Self,

You are good enough. You are going to be successful. You will make President’s Club. Why? Because. You are not average. You work your ass off everyday. You are TRYING.

It will will will will will will pay off.

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Dear Charli,

GET OUT OF MY PERSONAL SPACE.

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Dear Carbs,

Fuck the hell offfffffffffffffff. FUCK OFF.

TarablyWicked

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Dear Old Man,

I get that you are grumpy because you haven’t eaten dinner. I bet your dinner involves complex carbohydrates. Guess what?! Mine doesn’t and I am just as cranky if not more.

Fuck you stupid owner david.

Tarable.

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Dear Ken Adams,

Fuck. Seriously, the thin line is getting thinner by the moment.

Regina Philange
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Dear Hungry,

We legitimately hate you.

TarablyWicked

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Dear Girls Trip,

Its GONNA HAPPEN.