Honest Tuesday’s: I Turn Tables.
Mar 15, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Etc., Friendship, Honest Tuesday's, Random
Welcome to Honest Tuesday’s! A place where you can come and be totally honest about shit that you normally would not be honest about.
So yeah. I don’t turn tables like a DJ or anything like that. (That would be rad if I was though.)
Instead, I turn tables in this blog and ask YOU questions that you get to be honest about. I am not gonna lie. Some might make you feel uncomfortable.
Deal with it.
On that note … Do you or Would you …
…. think that when your significant other is away from you that they are cheating?
…. start off a conversation with “FYI, I only plan on listening to part of your conversation because I think you are fucking boring” if you know that you will ahead of time, to avoid wasting that 10 minutes of your life?
…. stop masturbating when your significant other enters the room?
…. throw temper tantrums as an adult?
…. reveal all of your fantasies, no matter how dirty or socially unaccepted?
…. shelter your kids from everything, some things, or nothing at all?
…. cry, even if you’re only crying because you feel sorry for yourself?
…. always forgive, even if you never forget?
…. avoid confrontation, even if all you want to do is punch a bitch in the mouth?
…. lie to your kids to save their feelings?
…. act as if you like the food, even if you are literally gagging it down with each bite … simply to spare someone’s feelings?
…. suffer complete unhappiness so that your kids are raised in a 2 parent home?
…. consider yourself a true friend, or a fair weather friend?
…. simply wait for someone to shut up so you can begin talking?
…. ever wonder what your life would be like if you took the other path?
Have a WONDERFULLY Honest Tuesday! 
Tags: Honest Tuesday's, honesty, lies, truth, Tuesday
Whatever Happened to Wednesday’s: True Friendship
Mar 2, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Family, Friendship, Out with the Old Wicked in with the New Wicked, Whatever Happened to? Wednesdays
Happy Hump Day folks, and welcome to Whatever Happened to Wednesday’s!
Today, my WeHtW’s post has little to do with me and more to do with my own observations.
The reason why is because I have already flushed my non-true friends down the figurative toilet.
It is hard to let friends go. Especially when you have a history with them. It is hard to swallow the fact that someone who you once thought you would end up an old bitty with … may have a different path than you.
But it is life.
The thing that bothers me the most is when people … adults … behave like children in the friendships.
Judgment
2 faced behavior
Conditions
Unrealistic expectations
Lies
Non existent communication
I could go on forever.
The point is that I have found that rarely (with females specifically) do childhood friendships go the long haul. I know many will argue that my view is not accurate. “I have been friends with SonSo for 2367845 years” blah blah blah.
I get it.
There ARE friendships that have gone the long haul. The difference is that each person in that friendship have grown together in the friendship. Both parties have become adults. And in adulthood, they have grown to accept the other person for all of their imperfections and flaws. It is similar to a marriage. When any relationship goes the long haul, there are kinks and bumps and hiccups.
You don’t just smile through them. Sometimes you knock down drag out whoop each others asses to get through it. Period.
One thing that I will say about each of my TRUE friendships is that each and every one of them have just embraced me for me and I have done the same. It may have taken an argument or 2 to get there … but if we made it through the last 5 years and remained friends … you and I will be lifelong.
I am not a judger. I may fucking loathe whatever the decision is that my friend is making … but you know what? It is not my decision to make. I am gonna love and stand by. I am gonna listen, and you can bet your ass when the bitch finally gets the clue I am gonna tell her about herself on some “I told your ass so” shit when she figures it out for herself. That is what a true friend does.
I am a true friend to my friends. I always will be. But I am not perfect, and I do not expect my friends to be perfect either. Unless awesome = perfect. Because all of my friends are awesome.
I am flaky sometimes. I forget to call you back. I am over extended and sometimes unable to manage my time well. I am selfish sometimes. But there isn’t a time where I would not bend over backwards if my friend needed me to be there. There isn’t a time where I wouldn’t give them my last god damn dollar if I knew my friend needed it more than I did.
It really hurts me to see a friend lose a friend. Almost as much as if I were the one losing the friend myself.
I just wish that each were able to fully step out of their own shoes and into the others. Most of the time, each have valid points in the hurt that they hold in their hearts … but that hurt can be blinding. Blinding to the point that the communication between friends goes down the toilet.
That usually is where The End fits.
I am quite confident that I have closed the book on all of the friendships that were dead weight on my life. It is a good feeling to know that I am finally surrounded by people who get it and me.
What are your thoughts on friendship?
Have you kept any friends from childhood? Are they more friends or acquaintances?
If you could be a crayon, What color and Why?
Tags: Friendship, high school, honesty, love, truth
Honest Tuesday’s: Say What You Need to Say.
Jan 18, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, Honest Tuesday's, Out of Wicked's Mouth, Ranteriffic, bitch
Hello! Welcome to Honest Tuesday’s. A place where you can come and be honest about shit that you would be dishonest about otherwise.
So this topic today is not something that I am admitting any dishonesty about. Because if any of you know me, you know that I am 99.9% gonna tell your ass about yourself. Unless 1) I might get fired or 2) I might go to jail. And even then I have taken the risk.
Anyway…
Sometimes I feel like I am surrounded by cowards. People who are so scared to just tell someone how they feel.
“We really aren’t friends.”
“I am in love with you but I am too stubborn to say it first.”
“I didn’t invite you out for a reason.”
“No. I am NOT going to call you.”
“I think you are repulsive and would rather not have sex than have sex with you.”
“I am cheating on you.”
“If I wanted you to show up, I would have invited you.”
“We don’t hang out because your significant other is a complete fucking douchebag.”
“Your breath smells like someone took a shit in your mouth.”
“I hate it when you constantly interrupt me in the middle of a sentence.”
I mean seriously?! Are you that afraid of being a real person to where you lead them along their merry way … believing something to be true that is complete and total bullshit? How is someone ever going to be able to fix that annoying thing that they have no clue is in fact annoying in the first place?
Say what you need to say. You are doing no one any favors by keeping it to yourself. Especially not the person whom you are keeping it from.
Furthermore, how asshole-ish are you to talk shit about a person behind their back? Anything you have to say behind their back … you need to figure out how to say it to their face. What are we? 12th graders? Is this fucking Mean Girls but in real life?
Say what you need to say. Fuck sparing someones feelings. Fuck being polite. Fuck smiling in someone’s face in an effort to not cause a scene or drama.
Just fucking tell them. I am over hearing about how so’n’so is blah blah blah all of the time. If you don’t fucking like them, then God damn tell them already.
Or don’t. Whatever. You are the one being a fake, 2 faced fucking asshole. Not me.
Fuck.
Get your weekly honesty out. Say sumpin!
Tags: high school, Honest Tuesday's, honesty, mean girls, say what you need to say
Honest Tuesday’s — 3
Nov 2, 2009 DUH, Family, Honest Tuesday's, Out with the Old Wicked in with the New Wicked, P.O.E. Biz, Thoughts and Perceptions, Wicked Wisdoms
Fuuuuuuuuuuuck. Is it Honest Tuesday’s again? Shit what happened to my week?
*sigh*
I am freaking the fuck out.
I took a risk leaving the boring, mundane, non-challenging place of employment that I was financially secure at for my new job. A biiiiiiiig risk. A if-I-dont-make-money-we-live-in-my-car risk. But the risk was one that if I was even remotely worried about my success at it… I probably wouldn’t have taken.
Not because I doubt my abilities. Because I am responsible for 4 fucking people. That is a huge god damned responsibility.
The deal is that my old job sucked. I may have known how much money I was making every 2 weeks … but it literally made me want to shoot myself in the face. That is how god damned non-challenging and boring it was. I H A T E D I T. My new job? I love. Other than the cunt that I hate … (andyouknewtherewasgonnabeoneofthosebitches) I love all of my co-workers. I love the dynamic. The jokes. The laughs and most of all I adore my bosses. It is a place that I actually look forward to spending a bulk of my time at on a daily basis.
I know. It is unheard of to love your job.
Not to mention the fact that I sell happiness every day. Yeah I said it: I sell happiness.
How many people can walk into work, punch the clock and know that the product for sale is making memories with their loved ones? That they sell smiles? That the pictures of happy kids on the beach is because *they* got them there?
Right. Not many people can actually say that. Well, *I* can. The problem is that selling happiness is harder than it sounds in this blog. People are fucking open sores of negativity. Pus-filled abscesses of negative energy. Sometimes, regardless of how excited you are … how happy … how much you believe in something to be so great … Sometimes it is not enough.
If someone doesn’t believe it, then I don’t get paid. Meaning, if I fuck up a call … and a person says no … I lose money. Meeeeeeeeaning, sometimes I have spent all day believing enough for the both of us… I have worked for free. I honestly never expected this to be as hard and as emotionally draining as it is. Every single day. I am absolutely not bitching about it. Simply put: I am living a complete lifestyle change right now, and it is freaking me out.
Did I mention that I was freaking out? I haven’t said much before because I am trying to smile my way through it … and you know … not succumb to the negative cesspool of people that are attempting to consume our society … but we are coming to the deadline and … well … shit is not that great. Financially. Will it get better? Fucking aye. I hope so.
Actually. Fuck that.
Yes. It will get better.
Yes. I will be successful.
Yes. I will rock this risk and not regret it.
But I am going to have to work my ass off for it to get better. Never in my life have I had to work this hard. Soooo the conclusion is that I am going to appreciate the success that much more.
Because I have earned it.
Not because it was given to me.
With that said, I am poor so this is a shameless plug to go and support me and buy my book. It is a great book and … well … hell I need all of the extra money I can get.
Thanks.
What have you been less than honest about this week?
What is the best compliment that you have ever recieved?
Have you ever played naked Twister or any other game naked?
Do you scrunch or fold your TP?
Honest Tuesday’s — 2
Oct 26, 2009 All Things Charli, All Things X, Etc., Family, Honest Tuesday's, Out of Wicked's Mouth, Out with the Old Wicked in with the New Wicked, Parenting, Random, Ranteriffic, This Thing Called Marriage., Wicked & D Quotables
Welcome to round 2 of Honest Tuesday’s. It is kinda like TMIT’s but not raunchy … nor will it make you throw up in your mouth. It is more of a weekly check yourself blog. What are you lying to yourself about? What are you pretending to be okay with but really are not okay with? Who are you really?
So I will go first. You will then read, judge me (yes you will) and then purge your own brutal honesty. Be anonymous if you like. I don’t care. It will feel better to say something honest rather than keep it in and lie to yourself and others forever.
I wont judge. Much. *winkwinkwink*
On this Tuesday, I will admit that I am not as mean, brash, hard core as I may like to come across to others.
Shut up.
Look. I will beat a bitch down if I am 1) instigated against 2) drunk enough and provoked 3) in the mood to.
It is true. I am not a tough girl. All of the time anyway. Don’t get it twisted though. I am not scared of no bitch no how. (It is serious enough to have an intentional grammatical error in my blog to irritate most of you reading it.)
This is the thing though.
I am not young. I seem to have adapted this ability to “assess the situation” with my oldER age of 30. Meaning, if a bitch is all disrespectful like in my face or anyone’s face around me that I give a shit about … I have begun to make a decision based on factors.
FACTORS. Who in the fuck makes a decision based on FACTORS?! Oh that’s right. Adults do. Adults who apparently need to set an example for their offspring do. I have been handed this memo certified letter style by D to remind me of my temper/mouth/flailing fucking fist on too many an occasion.
This memo reads something like this:
Dear Wifey,
You should reconsider your hot headed-ness in the following situations:
1) Grocery stores. (That bitch really was that dumb. I promise. It wasn’t an intentional jam on your ankle with her grocery cart)
2) Public FAMILY gatherings. (It is possible that parents of other offspring do not know what the fuck they are doing. You YELLING it across multiple children in profane verbiage is not appropriate. Yes I agree with you. SILENTLY)
3) In the car. (There are kids in the car with you. THE BITCH CANNOT HEAR WHAT A CUNT SHE IS ON THE FREEWAY IN ANOTHER VEHICLE! Your children however, can hear. When Charli uses the word cunt in front of people … I guarantee you will be mortified.)
Please adhere to the above mentioned guidelines promptly to avoid me laying the smack down on your vulgar ass.
Love, D.
Hmph. So what you are saying is, that I am too old to be vulgar? NEVAH! I get it though. If I want my kids to grow up with more tack than I have, I need to put a mild cork in it. Fine. Fine D. You win this time. But let me get drunk enough around NO KIDS or POLICE or BOUNCERS. SAY I WONT GOD DAMNIT!
Also, along with the not being tough admittance for this Honest Tuesday … I will confess a little about my non-toughness. I am sure all of you beezos will get a big fat kick out of it too.
1) I cry at that one State Farm Commercial where a young M.J. is singing “I’ll Be There” at the very beginning. Every. Single. Time. Single tear styles.
2) When Xavier and Charli hug one another, I cry. Like a baby.
3) I cry at chick flicks.
4) Puppies and kitties melt my heart. So do babies. And love. And sentimental gestures. And poetry. And corny pop songs. Sometimes I cry about one or more of these things.
5) I cry after really great sex.
6) I like to do stupid things for people I like. For instance, every Valentines Day, I buy the little Valentine cards and leave them on my co-workers desks. Or I bring the ladies in my life daisies. Or I draw love notes on the fog in the bathroom for X or D to tell them that I love them when they get out of the shower.
See? Not tough. I am a big fucking sap actually.
Shhhh. No one can ever know this secret about me. Keep it between us, K?
What is your Honest Tuesday Confession???
What turns you off about the opposite sex?
What country would you like to visit most? Why?
Would you give a homeless person CPR?
Tags: fight, honesty, marriage, memo, Parenting, road rage, tough, tuesdays, vulgar
Honest Tuesday’s — 1
Oct 19, 2009 Current Events, Honest Tuesday's, Out of Wicked's Mouth, This Thing Called Marriage., Wicked Wisdoms, love
As I have approached and now recently hit 30 I have realized something about myself.
I prefer to leave options open. I am married. I get it. I love my husband. Buuuuuuuuuut, it is enjoyable to know 100% that I could possibly have sex with another individual if I wanted to.
I know. This is wrong on so many different levels.
Listen. It is what it is. If I am convinced in my own Wicked head that you would fuck me, or you display Iwouldfuckyourbrainsout behaviors around/to me … I am not going to burst your bubble and tell you it will never happen. That is plain rude.
Who am I to tell you who you can and cannot fuck anyway?
Furthermore, as much as I adore my husband, nothing is ever 100% forever. What if something crazy happened? Define crazy? Does death and dismemberment sound crazy? What if he simply gets tired of my face and leaves me? What if I decide that I am a lesbian and not bisexual?
All I am saying is that if my knowing what you know and you knowing that I know is all that we know, then who is it hurting?
I am sure that many of you who know me in “real life” are all like “duh this is not new information Courtni” and some of you might be calling D right now to be all like “dang D your wife is a bigfatslutwhore-faceteasepants” because I has officially written a blog about the fact that I have had knowledge of a person wanting to fuck me and not squashing the thought first-hand.
Whatever if you do.
Whatever if you are judging my very moral existence.
Fine.
It goes with the territory of saying what everyone is thinking but no one wanting to admit that they are thinking it. Or doing it for that matter.
My point is that people want to fuck people. It is human nature. People, no matter how hard they try to suppress it, think about fucking other people all the time. Now that I am 30, comfortable in my own skin, comfortable in my marriage I am all about just being fucking honest about shit.
Tuesday’s honest moment: Allowing another individual think that they might have a chance to see my vagina for purely selfish and egotistical reasons.
Would you like to share with me in a moment of honesty on this fine Tuesday?
Who was your first celebrity crush?
Have you ever had sex with someone out of pity?
Tags: death and dismemberment, fuck, honesty, human nature, husband, Sex
Friendship is…
May 24, 2009 Friendship, Out of Wicked's Mouth, Random, The Tarably Wicked Show, Thoughts and Perceptions, Wicked Wisdoms
… helping with homework.
… drinking wine in pajamas. At 2:30pm on a Sunday.
… understanding when she has to be responsible. Even though she doesn’t wanna. Not even a little.
… loving my kids, at their brattiest.
… calling to talk about nothing.
… telling her she is pretty on her ugliest day.
… eating together.
… telling her when she has something stuck in her teeth.
… wiping her tears when she cries.
… shutting up and listening.
… not abandoning me when we aren’t getting along.
… always knowing the right thing to say.
… getting me.
… putting me in my place when I deserve it.
… allowing me to put her in hers.
… never being dishonest.
What does friendship mean to you?
Have a BFF that you haven’t said ‘I <3 you to lately?” Say it here.
Share a favorite friend memory.
Tags: bff, Friendship, honesty, love
