Wine-rable Mention.
Oct 5, 2009 DUH, Out of Wicked's Mouth, Out with the Old Wicked in with the New Wicked, Random, Thoughts and Perceptions, Wicked Wisdoms, Yum... or Lack There Of., bitch
I would like to mention that I have grown to enjoy a room temperature glass of red wine when I get home from work. I used to hate red wine. I have always been a die hard Boone’s fan.
I think that now that I have hit the ground running at 30, I should graduate from Boone’s to a proper Merlot or Cabernet. I am talking better than Franzia. Better than that Jug-O-Rossi that you could literally get hammered off of and then want to fight (because that is what Carlos Rossi Wiiiiiiiiine does to a bitch) a bitch by beating the life out of her face with the blunt end of that bottle.
(This has never happened to me or by me.)
(I may or may not have witnessed/drunkenly cheered at it before.)
Who noticed that I said a bitch a bitch back to back? 
I just like saying “A bitch”.
Like, “don’t make me get gangster on a bitch.”
Or, “Don’t let a bitch come at me crazy.”
Also, “I wish a bitch would.”
“A bitch” is a milder version of “This bitch.”
“This bitch better get off of my ass.”
“This bitch has a lot of nerve.”
My favorite: “I know this bitch did not.”
This = a specific bitch. Meaning, when I say “this bitch” in your general direction … you are most likely THAT bitch.
A = an unidentified amount with no general bitch intended in the statement. Meaning, any bitch will fit.
Bitch.
HAHA. But let a person call me a bitch. I will use the fuck out of the word bitch. But if you think you know me well enough and throw out the word bitch in my direction as a verb/adjective/noun about me? Psh. Pssssssssssh.
Cass, Q, Squish, Tricky and Just A: The joke won’t work if I call you out on it first.
Lastly, I may or may not be buzzed right now. Off of 2 buck chuck. Fine wine bitches. Fine mofo’in wine.
Carry on after answering some randomly awesome questions simply for my pleasure. Heh.
Have you ever had a crush on an animated character?
Have you ever won a prize in a contest?
(I was lying about drinking Boone’s. That never happened since I was 15.)
The Wrong Approach
Mar 30, 2009 Ranteriffic, Relationships, Sex, Wicked Wisdoms, bitch
Girl walks into a bar with her girlfriends.
Girl may or may not be into other girls.
Girl is obviously wearing a wedding ring.
Girl walks up to the bar to order a drink.
….
A couple is sitting to her left.
One of her girlfriends to her right.
Girl realizes that she is being stared at and talked about. By the couple.
Girl also realizes that the couple is new to the bring-a-girl-home scene.
The lady in the couple situation smiles at girl.
Girl averts eyes, and thinks “What the fuck is this broad staring at?”
And the bitch keeps staring. And talking.
….
Girl over hears the lady say “She is exactly who I would want to take home.”
Girl thinks, “Wait, what?”
Girl realizes that she is staring. Again.
What she doesn’t realize is that Girl is a pro multi-tasking ignorer.
Girl can appear to not notice or be paying attention with extreme expertise.
So, as Girl pretends to not notice her staring, and talking, the lady continues to talk shit.
“Who is she to ignore me smiling?”
“Am I completely invisible?”
“I don’t know how she couldn’t possibly see me smiling. Does she not have the ability to return my gesture?”
Girl gets her drink, glances down at the purse sitting on the bar stool next to the lady and says to her “That is a really cute purse.” and smiles at her.
Translation: I heard you, bitch. Don’t expect that simply because you put it out there that it will get returned to you. Furthermore, I heard you. It is unattractive to assume that everyone you are attracted to will reciprocate. Self-centered behavior is unattractive. Especially when it comes to the laws of attraction.
Confidence is sexy. I appreciate and possess an air of confidence in everything I do. But there is a fine line betweem confident and full of yourself.
I haven’t dated for many years, however certian aspects never die out. Leave your cheesy pick-up lines at the door. Leave the option of rejection open. Do not assume that every bitch in the place is watching you.
Especially in a bisexual encounter. Or a possible bisexual encounter.
If you are bisexual you know that the area is so grey when it comes to finding a person to explore and experience with, that it is so easy to misread signs and give off signals that could quite possibly offend someone.
I am no prude. However I do not like to be looked at as a piece of meat. By anyone. Male or Female. My sexuality is what it is, but there are standards in place. And expections. And a level of respect within myself that is extremely important to me.
Yep. I am Girl. And the above scenario happened to me this weekend.
I was less than amused. And not flattered. I am not new to being bisexual, and I will not be talked about as if I was on display at a ‘find your bisexual hook-up’ store.
Biiiiiiiiiiiiiitch.
Oh. Pee Ess. You were not nearly cute enough to act that way.
Have you ever been offended by the approach?
What would you have done if you were me?
Tags: bar, couple, dating, drink, hook-up, laws of attraction, offended, respect, threesome
