The Wrong Approach
Mar 30, 2009 Ranteriffic, Relationships, Sex, Wicked Wisdoms, bitch
Girl walks into a bar with her girlfriends.
Girl may or may not be into other girls.
Girl is obviously wearing a wedding ring.
Girl walks up to the bar to order a drink.
….
A couple is sitting to her left.
One of her girlfriends to her right.
Girl realizes that she is being stared at and talked about. By the couple.
Girl also realizes that the couple is new to the bring-a-girl-home scene.
The lady in the couple situation smiles at girl.
Girl averts eyes, and thinks “What the fuck is this broad staring at?”
And the bitch keeps staring. And talking.
….
Girl over hears the lady say “She is exactly who I would want to take home.”
Girl thinks, “Wait, what?”
Girl realizes that she is staring. Again.
What she doesn’t realize is that Girl is a pro multi-tasking ignorer.
Girl can appear to not notice or be paying attention with extreme expertise.
So, as Girl pretends to not notice her staring, and talking, the lady continues to talk shit.
“Who is she to ignore me smiling?”
“Am I completely invisible?”
“I don’t know how she couldn’t possibly see me smiling. Does she not have the ability to return my gesture?”
Girl gets her drink, glances down at the purse sitting on the bar stool next to the lady and says to her “That is a really cute purse.” and smiles at her.
Translation: I heard you, bitch. Don’t expect that simply because you put it out there that it will get returned to you. Furthermore, I heard you. It is unattractive to assume that everyone you are attracted to will reciprocate. Self-centered behavior is unattractive. Especially when it comes to the laws of attraction.
Confidence is sexy. I appreciate and possess an air of confidence in everything I do. But there is a fine line betweem confident and full of yourself.
I haven’t dated for many years, however certian aspects never die out. Leave your cheesy pick-up lines at the door. Leave the option of rejection open. Do not assume that every bitch in the place is watching you.
Especially in a bisexual encounter. Or a possible bisexual encounter.
If you are bisexual you know that the area is so grey when it comes to finding a person to explore and experience with, that it is so easy to misread signs and give off signals that could quite possibly offend someone.
I am no prude. However I do not like to be looked at as a piece of meat. By anyone. Male or Female. My sexuality is what it is, but there are standards in place. And expections. And a level of respect within myself that is extremely important to me.
Yep. I am Girl. And the above scenario happened to me this weekend.
I was less than amused. And not flattered. I am not new to being bisexual, and I will not be talked about as if I was on display at a ‘find your bisexual hook-up’ store.
Biiiiiiiiiiiiiitch.
Oh. Pee Ess. You were not nearly cute enough to act that way.
Have you ever been offended by the approach?
What would you have done if you were me?
Tags: bar, couple, dating, drink, hook-up, laws of attraction, offended, respect, threesome
Sex in Some Strange Place
Jan 6, 2009 Masturbate-able, Random, Relationships, Sex
D and I have the silliest comversations on the planet. Mainly because he is a pervert and turns everything into a sexual innuendo.
Example: This evening D was walking around the house singing “She’s got cakes like hostess.” after fondling my ass every 5 seconds as soon as I walked in the door from class. (Which was great BTW… the class not the fondling) Anyway, it has been 2 hours since this new hit single came out of his mouth, and he is still creating new variations of the kinds of ‘cakes’ she has. “Cakes like Lil Debbie and I wanna lick the frosting.” Right. This is what I live with on a day to day basis.
So from here we start talking about all of the wicked hot and random places we have fucked. After bantering back and forth for awhile, I realized that we are borderline exhibitionists. Or were, anyway.
We have had sex in the following random places:
the Macy’s dressing room
on the ferry (once was in my T-bird the other was a hand-job next to 2 old ladies on our way back from our honeymoon)
the staircase outside of our apartment in broad daylight.
in front of The Mirage in Vegas
at the recently built park down the street from our house
countless road head and pullover fuck-fests.
my shower sexcapade in a Victoria BC strip-club on our honeymoon.
This lead to the moment where we reminisced about what our sex life used to be, and what it has become. The days of 6 times a day all over our apartment have long since come and gone, but one thing still remains between us: Our love for sex with one another. As much as we strive for more frequent O-faces together, we both kinda get the fact that it is not always about us and that. So when we get the time, we savor it. There is never a blah-face. Always a Fuck-Yeah!-Face. My point is that real life and responsibility are so important… but so is intimacy with your significant other. Appreciate it if you are a 6 times a day bitch, because one day you will not have the freedom to fuck like porn stars.
I look forward to the days when my rugrats are off to college and viagra flows freely from the faucet. We will be old and grey and naked, and we wont give a shit who knows it. You better call before you drop by with your bridge games and cookies, or you might find D and my old wrinkly asses on the couch in a weird tantric position we learned in our old people sex refresher course. How’s that for a mental picture?
I’m just saying.
Where is the most random place that you have had sex? Did you get busted?
Tags: couple, freedom, honeymoon, naked, Random, Sex, sexcapade, strip club, Vegas, viagra
