You Just Think That You Are Funny.
Oct 28, 2009 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, I WIN!, Out of Wicked's Mouth, Out with the Old Wicked in with the New Wicked, P.O.E. Biz, Ranteriffic, bitch
Well then.
I guess someone told me, didn’t they?
I am going to do the following things in this blog:
1) Blow a teeny bit of smoke up my own ass.
2) Rant.
Someone said this to me. A person who I don’t speak to. Someone who does not have the repertoire with me to just make a joke like that. So she was seriously saying that she 1) did not think I was funny and 2) that I think that I am funny but that I am really not funny.
Um.
(This is the blowing smoke up my own ass part.)
Actually, I AM really funny. Like, HA HA funny. I pride myself on making jokes and poking fun with the people that I care about. Shit, even people that I don’t really care about. I love to laugh. It makes me feel good when I can make another person chuckle/giggle/snort when they are having a bad day.
I said in return to this unsolicited statement: “Oh I am funny. I know that much is true.” (good one, right?)
(and then the rant.)
For someone who doesn’t even know me to say that all of this time that I have spent confident in my funny demeanor has been just me in my own head … is … fucking offensive and totally uncalled for! Especially given the context of the conversation, the fact that not a single person in it was even acknowledging her presence OR the fact that … really?? No one even asked her.
What I think is funny is that sometimes … more often than not lately … people assume that I am the one. The one who won’t stand up for herself. The one who will just smile and nod and take someone’s shit. The one who will be talked to like she is half of a person.
The one who will get cut off on the motherfucking freeway and NOT pull out my legaltopurchaseatWalmartifIamover18 shotgun and point it directly at their motherfucking faces while still doing 75 on I405.
All I am saying is that I may or may not have pulled my Walmart shotgun out on a bitch for less.
I get that not everyone will like me, that not everyone will always think that I am awesome. Bitch you are the least liked bitch in the establishment. How do you like THEM apples? Huh?! HUH?!?! How about next time though, recognize game? Because what I look like on the outside has no bearing on the venom that comes from within my Wicked little soul.
I will run motherfucking circles around you. While making motherfuckers laugh. SIMULTANEOUSLY.
SAY SUMPIN!
If someone gave you $1,000 and asked you to kill a butterfly by burning it alive in the flame of candle, would you do it?
If a genie granted you 3 wishes, what would you ask for?
Do you watch porn? How would you react if you walked in on your significant other watching porn?
Tags: confrontation, inappropriate, rant, rude, venom, wicked, work
Hey Ms. Avoider, where have you been?
Sep 19, 2008 Friendship, Relationships, Thoughts and Perceptions
I have a friend who has a friend. Lets call her ‘Ms. Avoider’.
In this case, Ms. Avoider is a roommate. But she can come in many different disguises. A sister, a co-worker, a mother or even a childhood friend.
She avoids talking to my friend about how she feels. Instead, she bottles it up and pretends like everything is peachy keen… when realistically, she is fuming and angry. Now it isn’t like my friend is unapproachable. In fact, she is one of the most approachable people I have ever met. Her ability to take criticism is absolutely award winning.
If we were to take this friend specific situation and make it hypothetical… It would go a little something like this:
Ms. Avoider is one of those smile-in-your-facers, and then go behind your back and “vent” all of her problems with you to others. The others could be mutual friends, or even family members. She steals the right to know when you are doing something (even if it is a crock of shit) that is making her feel uncomfortable right up from under your feet.
When does this ‘venting’ cross the line into inappropriate and offensive?
In comes the hear-say. The part where the mutual friends and family come to you, concerned about the way you are treating her, or as informative sources for you to know that your suspicions are in fact correct… that Ms. Avoider is upset and for the following reasons.
What is your next step?
Do you confront her?
Do you wait until her next alcohol induced outburst?
It all depends on what you are looking to gain. 9 times out of 10, Ms. Avoider will continue on her path of bottled up destruction. She will, again, smile in your face and pretend that she was just having a bad day; a tiny lapse in judgment when she was ‘found in the bathroom sobbing by your insert title here.‘ She will hand you a band-aid, and let you believe that things are patched up… when really, she is still not disclosing any truth about her feelings. The other 1% of the time… and believe me when I tell you this is a rare rare case… she will let it all out. You will actually be okay… at least, until she finds something else to bottle up and avoid.
Why does Ms. Avoider behave this way? The world may never know the answer to this question because avoidance of truth is like any other toxic addiction. Even those who are enablers dont understand when or why… or even how it happens. Even with the best intentions, involving yourself with someone who consistantly avoids the truth, confrontation, or (most toxically) their feelings… can lead to hurt feelings and ended relationships.
Is your surname Ms. Avoider?
Are you related to her?
Tell me about a relationship where you have had to confront someone who avoids.
How did you resolve it? What was the outcome?
Did it permanently damage or repair your relationship with that person?
Tags: avoidance, avoiding confrontation, confrontation, enabling, Friendship, hear-say, relationship, toxic
