‘Scuse Me … I Just Vomited In This Blog.
Aug 29, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, Etc., Fitness Forward, Friendship, Out of Wicked's Mouth, P.O.E. Biz, Parenting, Random, Ranteriffic, Thoughts and Perceptions, Wicked Wisdoms, bitch
Today is as good a day as any to write a blog about things that have been 1) happening 2) not happening and 3) wandering around my thoughts like a transient.
Can you picture a transient with their backpack-on-a-stick in my head? Can ya?
What exactly is today though? Today is Friday. That is it. It is not a special day by any means. It is a Friday just like any other Friday. Instead of doing what I am supposed to be doing which is my job – I am sitting here pondering what this blog will discuss.
(by the time you are reading it though, it could very well be Sunday or Monday … but whatever.)
(Sorry K.A.)
Shit, this blog might turn in to more than one if it gets too lengthy. I may very well word vomit the fuck out of your eyes if I get a wild hair.
Don’t tempt me.
This brings me to my first thought: Should I even still blog here? It doesn’t seem like I have very many people interested in what I have to say anymore. Not that I necessarily blog for people specifically, but the commentary usually consists of 25% real comments 75% spam about a god damn vibrator website or something?
Hmmmmm … Are these spambots trying to tell me something?
Today I am wearing my fat pants. They are jeans that I haven’t worn in over a year because they were falling off of me. Literally. Not today. No way. They are quite fitted today and that actually sent me to tears over it this morning when I was looking in the mirror.
The reason behind me wearing my fat pants today might have a little something to do with the hand-to-mouth issue I have been having lately.
11PM chocolate doughnut in my mouth? Not helping.
Mashed potatoes? Not helping.
I cannot even remember all of the stupid stress/emotional/pitypartyaboutmyfatness eating I have done as of late but because of it I have gone backwards instead of forward. Now my cute clothes clothes don’t fit and I feel like shit.
So here I sit, wearing my fat pants feeling all crappy about it. And as I re-read this last thought, I am like “fuck should I really even write it? It sounds all whiny and pathetic to even be talking about it yet AGAIN. Maybe I should shut up and run my fat ass to the gym more than once in a blue moon.”
Or maybe I will do both.
Just because I fell off the wagon and picked up 10lbs along the way doesn’t mean that I cant catch back up to it and hop on.
Yeah to some it is “only 10lbs” or “you have picked up a little weight, it isn’t a big deal” but it is a lot of pounds and an even bigger deal to me. To me I can feel it from the inside out and I am not a fan. If I could find the central location of said 10lbs and click the dislike button on them I would.
That also means I am now 25 pounds from my goal. Damnit.
Moving on.
I have an opinion about specific people lately that I have spent a lot of energy keeping to myself. It is probably why there has been an absence in my blogs. Because there becomes a point where no matter how unsugarcoated and blunt I am … there is a line where too blunt could cause a rift in other peoples lives who have little to do with any of my opinions. One has to be careful when being blunt as an adult sometimes which I think is bullshit.
What I will say though is that I absolutely despise flakes. I think that Mrs. Good is my #1 advocate on this very subject actually. I am pretty sure that she could go on for hours about it if she had the time. The fact is flakiness = inconsideration for others. I am too old to have this lack of consideration in my life.
This is how non-flakiness is supposed to work:
Friend: “Lets make plans for Tuesday”
Other Friend: “Perfect! Give me a call when you have an idea what time you will be free!”
Friend: “For sure!!
Fast forward to Tuesday. What is supposed to happen is the friend is supposed to call the other friend. Why? Because that friend was the plan initiator. The other friend is the plan recipricator. The other friend goes about their business as any other Tuesday business would go. What actually happens is the friend never calls. Not to confirm or to cancel. The friend just lets the day come and go and thinks that it is okay.
Non-flakes call. They say things like “Man, I am so sorry that I cannot make it. I overbooked myself today. Can we reschedule?” How freaking simple is that? I am just wondering because fuck if people have no clue how to do this simple step.
Furthermore, there comes a point where people need to be held accountable for their actions. I will (reluctantly) be the first to admit when something is my bad. I will (force myself through gritted teeth) to apologize when I am wrong. What I will not do is try and let time pass and act as if just because 2 weeks passed, everything is now okay between me and someone else.
Lets not ignore the elephant in the room people. It is sitting right there. Say “how’d ya do!?” and keep it pushin.
Don’t come at me sideways because I sit on the elephants lap while you do the avoiding responsibility dance. Friend, family, co-worker … I don’t give a fuck. Own your shit. Or stay out of my life.
Ya digg?
Furthermore I would like to say the following to a certain couple of catty bloggers in the ’sphere: “Hate away bitches. Continue on with your high school mean girls ways. What is going to happen is this: You will come to a point where 1) people will get over your clique-y bullshit. 2) You will interact with some adults who will clown you to tears and let you and everyone else catty that is around you know what is up with your bullshit.
The bottom line is this. You may be all power trip queen of your metropolitan area, but you are not queen of the world. Your circle is not that big and I don’t give a fuck how tweet savvy you are. Karma is a bitch. Remember that.
Oh. And also, I really really really really want my long hair back. I am so sick of it being short that I could cry.
On that note, life is alright and I miss blogging but I need some people to make me feel like they want me to keep blogging here. Deal?
Name the one current event that has you fired up (in a good OR bad way) right now.
All Over The Place OR Too Much Coffee
Jun 29, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Etc., Out of Wicked's Mouth, P.O.E. Biz, Random, Suck It!
I had too much coffee today. It is 11:40pm and I am still “blahblahblahblahblah” as if it were 5 in the evening.
Fuck. This is gonna be all over the place. Sorry in advance.
I also feel like yelling. Yelling about my book taking 347686344236455684663434678 days to get published so that people can buy it. Yelling at myself for getting in my own way. (yes it is possible to get in your own way.) Yelling at this one fucking person at work that thinks their shit doesn’t stink and could use to get knocked down 34 pegs but I can’t because apparently you will get fired for telling someone about themselves if another person doesn’t like you or some shit. Yelling out CREDITS! randomly in honor of my friend as if I had turrets syndrome or something.
CREDITS! See! I already feel better.
I also don’t give a fuck about Twilight. Wanna know what team I represent? TEAM AWESOME, THAT’S WHAT!
(sorry Danielle. I know you love it.)
Speaking of, I wanted to make a statement about assholes. (weird, I know)
I am so sick of people not taking responsibility for themselves. You can’t blame everyone for everything that goes wrong in your life. You just can’t. Eventually, you MUST own your part in how your life plays out.
Seriously.
“OMG. My boss fired me because I was late. It isn’t my fault I was late. Traffic (thathappenseveryday) was horrible and my kids (whoaresloweveryday) were slow out the door and my significant other (whoisadouchebageveryday) was being a douchebag. My boss is an asshole!”
“My life sucks. I have no money (becauseIcantkeepajobformorethan5months).”
“I was gonna be the next NFL STAR except I hurt my knee and now I am a drunk asshole at noon on a Tuesday!”
Seriously people. Stop blaming the world. Look in the mirror. I get that some of it is uncontrollable … but if you find yourself the victim half of your life or more … it might not be as uncontrollable as you think.
Pass it on.
K? K.
Furthermore. I have fallen off the healthy wagon. I am eating like crap. I can feel my body hating me. I have spiraled out of control! Stupid cheeseburgers and cookies. What the crap is going on?! I need to fix it.
Also. You! Are you there? You have been a lurker you SOB and I want to make sure you are here. Why? So I can tell you that I adore you and it wasn’t personal and I am sorry and I hate your face.
Lastly, I need some suggestions. What should I blog about? What would you like to see? What am I missing? Who should my eye candy’s be? I have a lot going on at work and what not so by the time I get home my brain is fried. Ya digg?
Also:
Bon Jovi or Poison?
NKOTB or Nsync?
SWV or Destiny’s Child?
Nas or JayZ?
Would you rather lick a sweaty arm pit or eat out of a bowl that had been puked in and not rinsed?
Oh. P.S. YOU.
Honest Tuesday’s: I Don’t Slither.
Jun 28, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, Honest Tuesday's, P.O.E. Biz, Ranteriffic, Suck It!
Call me a cunt. Call me a vulgar, loud mouthed bitch. I don’t give a shit.
What you cannot call me is a snake. Or a liar. If you do, I might very well give you an eye-jammie for it.
Just saying.
For those of you who regularly read my blogs … I seem to get the maddest about the same 5 or 6 specific things. So, here is your advance apology for 1) any repeated information and 2) being a bit vague.
Moving on.
The one thing that makes my blood boil the most has to be liars. Liars and people who will do anything in their power to get ahead. Even if it means sending another person to the wolves. Even if it means selling their soul to the devil.
I would rather spend my life with nothing, living with my 2 kids and D in my Mazda, than ruin anothers simply so that I can move past them in the food chain.
It is point one as to why I hate corporate environments. Why I have avoided any sort of leadership position for years. Why I kept business and personal so separate. I was actually turned away from and said no to promotions because the powers that be above me who made the decisions knew that I was a brutally honest person and that I called it like I saw it. No matter what. The one promotion I was offered, and took into a leadership position was the best possible situation and my manager at the time (Goddess bless her) just got me. She was my mentor and my friend and when push came to shove, she would grab me by the ear and drag me into a conference room to either 1) tell me about myself or 2) let me yell it out to HER rather than to someone that might go crying to HR about some shit like a fucking vagina.
I can’t help it. It is in my blood. It is something that I will never ever change simply to make an extra buck and in all of the positions I have ever held, I have been perfectly content saying what I wanted to say in my measly hourly waged position.
It hurts my feelings to feel like I am surrounded by dishonest people. I have left many a position because of this very feeling. I am unhappiest in a place where I am forced to wonder who I can and cannot trust. The problem is really that everywhere I end up … it follows. It follows because this world is filled with snakes in human form.
As much as I try to surround myself with like-minded people, the bottom line is that no matter where you end up … they are there, slithering their snakey selves around. Smiling in faces, kissing asses … and making me fucking crazy.
These reasons are also the reasons why my end goal is to own my own business. Because then, when the snake-head is revealed, I can fire their fucking asses and send THEM straight to hell where their snakey asses can become appetizers for the devil himself.
I don’t slither. I won’t slither. Not for you, not for money not for anyone.
I will however, stand up and be a good person and tell the truth, even if that means that I am the bad guy. I will tell you about yourself when you need to be told and I will always say what everyone else will not say. Hate me for it or love me for it, I don’t care.
I can’t talk specifics. Those who read my blog who know what I am talking about know why. But this is my purge place. My house of self-written therapy. If I don’t get it out I will explode and that in itself is full of ugliness. I am a happier, more positive person here. It has been weighing on me for weeks and it feels good to blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahg it out.
Happy Tuesday. Come be honest with me about things you cannot be honest with anyone else about. No judgment.
(p.s. thanks for listening)
Tags: corporate politics, liar liar pants on fire, snakes, work
Ohhhh Yeahhhh … YGWM & Friday MFING Eye Candy!!!
Jun 24, 2010 All Things Charli, All Things X, Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Family, Friday Eye Candy, Friendship, P.O.E. Biz, Random, This Thing Called Marriage., You've Got Wicked Mail
Happy Friday!
OMG I am so glad to be back on my weekly Friday open letters!
Are you?!
Dear D,
Yes you ruined my day by using all of the chocolate syrup and not letting me know the umpteenth million store trips that we were out so I could pick more up. The ONE time I want vanilla ice cream with cinnamon toast crunch and chocolate syrup in like 3246734 months and we are out of the KEY ingredient.
Day ruiner.
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Dear Snake,
I know you are a snake. You slither around like you are so fucking slick but I hear you rattling your snakey fucking tail around trying to get in good with people. They might not see your snakey self … all wolf and sheeps clothing styles … but I do.
You aint slick homey.
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Dear You,
I win. ALWAYS.
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Dear Squishy,
I just wanted to reiterate that I am so happy for you and Irish and that I am so excited to watch your marriage grow. (the fun and the not so fun. I am sadistic like that. 
)
There isn’t enough happiness in the world for your level of deserving happiness. Just saying.
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Dear Kimmie and Tarable,
I am so happy that you are my besties.
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Dear Bradley Cooper,
I would fuck you sideways, upside down, and inside out. I just thought you should know.
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Dear Charli,
You are such a beautiful girl. A funny, loving, beautiful girl with so much personality. I just wish you were not such a demanding, bratty, bossy boots. Let’s work on that, k?
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Dear X,
We are gonna make this work. However possible. I am gonna figure it out.
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And now for some Eye Candy …
Rugby Player Gavin Henson. YUM. Do you SEE this body?!
And Ms. Katarina Van Derham. She is the spokes model for St. Pauli’s Girl. Hi. Hottie.
Alright peeps. You know the drill. Come purge your week in open letter forum so that you can thoroughly enjoy your weekend! Go! Let em have it!
Tags: bradley cooper, cinnamon toast crunch, Friday Eye Candy, gavin henson, Katarina Van Derham, YGWM
The Bitch is Back Or A Catsup Blog
Jun 22, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, Etc., Friendship, Honest Tuesday's, Out of Wicked's Mouth
Yup. I said it. I have my ammo locked and loaded. It has been months since I was able or inspired to write every day and now I am ready.
I see that I had some fair-weather readers … my following dropped by about 30 people. Fuck you. Don’t come back. You are probably fair-weather friends too and I am not a fan of that.
So I went to Austin. It was ama.zing.
It was unexpectedly overwhelming for me. I had not ever been a bridesmaid before, so I was completely unaware of the responsibilities of being one. You know, having to be places at specific times and things. All of the weddings I had ever been in, I just had to show up for the reception … you know?
It was also overwhelming because frankly, having that much love in such a small area is intense. I should have prepared myself. I am dealing with some personal changes where I am more aware of my personal space being invaded by others my three year old, etc. all of the time and I am more and more interested in keeping that space to myself as much as possible. I am finding myself less interested in being touched or anything remotely resembling you being in my space.
Is that weird? (I don’t even know why I am asking this. I really don’t give a fuck if it is weird. Bottom line: geoufmyspacealready)
Regardless, there is one thing about my life that makes me happiest, other than my family. That is that I have (for the most part) an amazing group of people around me. Finally. It was an amazing thing to let 2 and a half years lapse and still feel (for the most part) the exact same way that I did then about my ladies. Even more happy is that 2 pretty special ladies in my life were exactly how I hoped they would be and we bonded exactly like I hoped we would bond.
Austin solidified many friendships. New ones and old ones that needed to be re-solidified. If that makes sense. That is a good feeling.
When I look back at specific moments from that trip, I am reminded of the fact that we all kinda just love each other. Unconditionally. Who has that kind of love anymore?
I know, right?
It seems like in this day and age, everyone’s love comes with a condition attached to it. Like “I will love you forever but you need to always have money or I am out.” Or “I vow to love you as long as you do this and this and this for me.” Even “Our love is eternal. But if you get sick, I have to leave you after fucking some other sap behind your back.”
I am not a fan of this. I am a fan of communicating with a person. Expressing feelings and frustrations. I am also a fan of being heard. And respected. And understood. I am a big fan of working out differences and not holding a grudge (most of the time). That is what true friendship is all about, isn’t it?
So, I look back to my trip and thank God every day that I was able to make it and that I am fortunate enough to have so many different forms of awesomeness surrounding me … and that most all of them made it there to celebrate the wedding of my soul sister.
Blogged about Austin: Check.
Moving on.
Kids. I have them.
They are doing pretty freaking great … Xavier had his art featured in a community art festival over Father’s Day weekend which is super awesome. Charli is … a brat and a half but so smart. She is a potty hater and really enjoys bossing everyone around as much as possible.
X is now out of school. D may or may not be on the verge of losing his mind … and it isn’t even the end of the first week with the both of them home. All day. Together. Terrorizing each other. Endlessly.
I need ideas of crap for them to do. Seriously. Projects. Crafts. Activities. Anything. Or, I am going to come home and each child will be hung upside down in opposite corners by their toes and D will be in another corner, rocking back and forth with his ears covered in sheer agony of this summer boredom situation.
Some things I have come up with are:
Make your own candy necklaces.
Sock puppets
Handprint rainbows
Scavenger hunts
Alright: GO!
Blogging about kids: Check Check.
Work is … work.
I can’t really go into the details of it but if I could wish for a different situation than the one that is present … I would. Ya digg?
Also the book publishing is taking forever. I am working on getting everything finalized and ready for purchase. Thanks for being patient.
Blogged about work and book: Check Check Check
I will have a more coherent blog with extra purpose tomorrow. I might talk a lot about the oil spill, so stay tuned. ( I am lying. That is the last motherfucking thing I want to blog about. If you want to read about that, try CNN.com. Just saying )
Oh. Would you rather have someone tell you the truth or lie to spare your feelings. Be honest about this one. Don’t stroke me just because you THINK I might want to hear you say “truth”.
Oh. And for YOU. Heh.
Tags: austin texas, awesomeness, cnn, Friendship, love, oil spill, weddings, you
YGWM & No Eye Candy
Apr 29, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Friday Eye Candy, In It To Gym It, Relationships, This Thing Called Marriage., You've Got Wicked Mail
Happy Monday Peeps!
Welcome to Friday! Sorry in advance for the fact that there is no Eye Candy. I am blogging from my phone and I haven’t had time to save pictures.
So. Close your eyes and imagine your own favorite eye candy. Word?
Alright. You know the drill. Purge your week in open letter form so you can thoroughly enjoy your weekend.
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Dear Sacrifices,
Fuck you for being so harsh. For being unexpected and stupid and expensive.
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Dear FatWicked,
You are on your mfing way out the door.
Byefattie! Bye!!
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Dear Responsibilities,
FINE!!!!!!!
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Dear D,
Mama’s proud. You are doing so well. Even with the tough times, you really are trying to remain optimistic. I love you.
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Dear Self,
You are getting there. Stop focusing on the negative.
These credits don’t sell themselves, so you must be doing somethin’ right.
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Dear Asshole,
Hahahahahaahhahaahahahahaha you are sooooooo stupid. So so so so stupid. Like, sooooooooooooooooooooo.fucking.stupid.
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Dear You,
FuuuuuckOfffffffff.
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Dear Dipshit Co-Worker,
No one cares to talk to you THAT much about NO. If you liked it THAT much, then move there. K?
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Alright. You go. Handle your business.
People Say The ‘Funniest’ Shit?
Apr 27, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, P.O.E. Biz, Random, Thoughts and Perceptions, Wicked Wisdoms, love
So the other day we are sitting in our daily meeting.
The craziest broad on the planet (no really, she is crazy as hell, i.e. her Hello Kitty obsession, jumping shoes, weird hoarding and insane to the membrane clothes. If I could take a picture of her insanity, I totally would.) starts to describe her encounter with local law enforcement to us.
Boss: “Hey Crazy Broad! Tell us what happened to you on your way to work today!”
Crazy Broad: “Ohhhhhhhh yeah, I was pulled over on my way to work by this crazy DIKE bitch!”
The air was literally sucked out of the room for about 5 seconds.
I mean, are you fucking kidding me right now? In a corporate setting? In any setting really but in a CORPORATE setting? In front of 35 co-workers, ONE of them being the bestest and prettiest lesbians I know? (actually she is the bestest and prettiest because she is the bestest and prettiest … not because she is a lesbian.)
I know that I am inappropriate, but that is crossing so many lines that it is silly.
It makes me wonder.
How did she know she was in fact a lesbian? Did the cop attempt to solicit a carpet munching session in lieu of receiving a ticket? What if this aforementioned 5-0 was actually a total homophobe?!
What if the law enforcement officer was a black lesbian? Would she have still said the same thing? Or would she have thrown the race card into it?
How did she know she was crazy? Did she have proof? Did the po-po freak out on her all exorcist style or something? Was this local slice of bacon wearing a straight jacket? Maybe it is that it takes a crazy to know a crazy?
*shrug*
And then I wonder how often we (and I say we because I totally mean me too) totally use these disrespectful slangs toward others behind closed doors. Things that we normally would not say in a group as large as the group whom I work with?
I wonder how she would feel if someone blurted out that she was a crazy negrogookspiccrackerwhopjewhomo in the middle of our meeting?
I wonder how many people don’t even realize how hurtful these things are to say? Including myself?
I dunno. It made me aware. Maybe we should be a teensy bit more conscious of how our words affect other peoples feelings.
*shrug* … Just a thought …
Fill in the blanks:
My favorite time of day is _______________________.
I wish that I could go ____________________.
I should have ______________ yesterday.
YGWM & Friday Eye Candy
Apr 22, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, Etc., Friday Eye Candy, Friendship, In It To Gym It, P.O.E. Biz, You've Got Wicked Mail
YO! Happy MotherTruckin’ Friday people!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekend!
Yeah … so …
Dear Non-Owner,
I am not even mad that you didn’t allow me to get a word in. I am not mad that you punked your husband after he was 100% sold on it. What I am mad is that 1) you have no idea that you robbed your family of another week of vacation 2) that you are so ignorant … that you will never have an appreciation of the fact that my job is to HELP you and not SWINDLE you and 3) you hung up in my face.
When you throw the THOUSANDS of dollars in your yard in the form of this wedding and honeymoon for your daughter and then light in on fire … please take a picture and send it to me because I would like to use your stupidity as an example in the future.
I bet you think you are soooooooooooo fucking gangster. You have another thing coming. In the long run, you are just an ignorant coward.
I pity you.
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Dear Tarable,
I big fat love you.
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Dear Gym,
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Dear KenAdams,
I want to stab you in the eye.
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Dear Beeeeeeyotch,
Is your finger broken? Pick up the motherfucking phone and dial me back. This is VM #3.
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Dear State of Washington,
I want to stab you in the eye.
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Dear Whateverisgoingonwithmerightnow.
Seriously?
Get through the changes and lets move on already. You are throwing a wrench in all that is good in the world of Wicked. Really? I think I can speak for everyone involved when I say that “Over It” is an understatement.
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Dear Squishy,
The Muy Importante was the following: (of course it is in list form)
1) You are beautiful
2) I miss you
3) I love you
and
4) I just wanna be near you. Regularly.
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Dear Girls Trip,
Wahooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
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Dear _____
I wish that sometimes, you would listen more.
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And Now for some MUCH needed Eye Candy:
Sexy Soldiers:
And you KNOW I had to throw some Tom Cruise in Top Gun up in here:
And the Sexy Ms. Berry … Ms. Berry …
Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd there you have it.
You all know the drill by now. Come. Purge your week long bullshit in Open Letter Form so that you can thoroughly enjoy your weekend.
Tags: Friday Eye Candy, halle berry, tom cruise
Kinda Like Egg Beaters … But Not.
Apr 20, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, DUH, Etc., I Forgot to Tag, Masturbate-able, Out of Wicked's Mouth, P.O.E. Biz, Random, Sex
I have words that are favorite words.
For instance, the word “Dickbeater”. Who knows what a dickbeater is?
Lemme draw you a picture. (No really I am drawing it.)
Damn. I should win an award for this illustration.
A dickbeater is a hand.
I.E.
As I was coming around the corner yesterday, my boss (referred to as mom) is elbow deep in my trail mix on my desk.
Me: “WTF! Get your dickbeaters out of my trail mix!”
Mom: “Dickbeaters?!”
Me: (throwing up my hands) “Yeah … diiiiiiiiiiickbeaters!”
Mom: “Really?!”
Me: “Yup.”
For the rest of the night, dickbeaters was the word of the day.
“What are you doing?”
“Oh nothing, just rubbing my dickbeaters all over your face.”
“Hey MOM (boss) look! My dickbeaters are cupping your drink!”
“Are those dickbeaters dialing the phone right now?”
“Get your dickbeaters off of me right now!”
See! Find a situation, and the word dickbeater will fit right in. It is applicable in almost every context.
“I would totally help you right now, but I have my dickbeaters full.”
“Sorry, my dickbeaters are tied in this situation.”
“I just love it when we hold dickbeaters.”
“Can I have your daughters dickbeater in marriage?”
“Man. She has such pretty dickbeaters!”
“The dickbeater that rocks the cradle”
Furthermore, I love my job and the people I work with. I also love my friends and my kids and my husband.
That is all I got. It is 12:30, I am tired, loaded and well … my dickbeaters are full right now. I need some sleep.
You go. Use dickbeater in a sentence.
Had you ever heard the word dickbeater before today?
Tags: beater, dick, dickbeater. egg beater.
Who Really Cares? Oh Wait … WE Do.
Apr 13, 2010 Completely Hypothetical and Generally Specific, Current Events, Random, Ranteriffic, Relationships, Thoughts and Perceptions
I think that Hollywood is funny. I like to read the shit that is put out there about “America’s Royalty” simply for amusement purposes.
What is the most funny to me is that there is all of this hoopla made over shit that celebrities do.
Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike … Infidelity.
Um. That happens to e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e. for the most part. I don’t know many people who have not either cheated or have been cheated on. Myself included. On both ends.
But when a big shot … an idol … an ICON does it.
BLADOW!
Then come allllllllllllllllllll of the others. Out of nowhere.
“I fucked him!”
“She said she loved me!”
“I was his mistress from such and such and such and such!”
Is it truth? Is it money hungry? Where is the proof other than he said/she said?
But really, that is completely so far from the point. Actually, the point is … who the hell cares? But … then again … that is the actual problem. People actually care that Tiger Woods is a complete sex addict sociopath. They are emotionally invested in the fact that *gasp* Jesse James and Sandra Bullock are not the perfect couple that the press portrayed them to be.
Liiiiiiiiiiiiiike … Family issues.
People get divorced. It happens. How many people know someone who has been through a divorce/custody battle or have been through it themselves?
Exactly.
Yet. A celeeeeeebrity couple gets divorced and is dealing with custody issues … and …
BLADAW
One parent talks shit about the other in an “exclusive interview”.
So then the other finds an network to “exclusively” talk shit about the other parent.
Do they ever talk shit to each other? Or just publicly? What about their kids?
Again — besides the point. Dirty laundry is dirty laundry and it needs to be kept in the hamper and not out in the middle of the fucking street for everyone to see. And again … people actually give a shit. Emotionally attached to people whom we don’t even fucking know.
I have an idea. It might be far-fetched but I am going to reach for it. I am also gonna attempt to live it myself … because like I said at the very beginning, I read into this nonsense for amusement. Regularly.
You ready?
Maybe, just maybe … redirect that attention toward the relationships that actually matter.
Our own marriages/relationships.
Our own promises.
Our own kids.
Our own friendships.
We might all see a drastic improvement in them if we spent the time investing in our own, rather in the relationships of complete strangers.
I dunno. Just a thought.
What color is your toothbrush?
Did you have a nickname in high school?
Choose a storybook character that attracts you the most?
Tags: jesse james, jon and kate plus 8, jon gosselin, kate gosselin, paparazzi, sandra bullock, tabloid, tiger woods
