Wicked Facts
Dec 2, 2009 DUH, Etc., Out of Wicked's Mouth, Random, Sex, Thoughts and Perceptions, bitch
I have this thing in my head called a brain. Inside of it holds many interesting thoughts and questions. If brains were famous people… mine would be a mix between Weird Al, Madonna, and Awesome-O.
I secretly hate penguins. All birds actually. Penguins are dirty ugly birds just like all of the other birds in the world and I cannot fucking fathom how people are all “OMGLOOKATTHEPENGUINITISSOCUUUUUUUUUUTE!” at the zoo. Cute at the zoo is a tiger. Not a waddling bird.
I only like the crispy outside of cookies. The gooey centers make me pukey. Other gooey centers… well… Heh.
I picture people fucking. When I meet someone, I almost always pick their favorite position out and visualize them doing it in the first 45 seconds. For most of you, this is not new information.
I have an uncanny talent for calling out penis size without ever even seeing it. I think I have been wrong 2 times out of the bajillion I have called out. (the best thing is seeing the guys face when I am right)
I lie to bill collectors. Even when it isn’t necessary.
I have really bad skin. On my face anyway. I am super self conscious about it.
I am also self conscious about my breath. I am constantly making sure that I am not the one with stank breath because I have a seriously high sense of smell and there is nothing worse than a motherfucker with bad breath all up in your face.
Sometimes, I like to pretend that I am an evil villain, mid plot for taking over the world. Sometimes I even evil laugh to myself to make it more realistic.
I eat pear halves from the middle out cause they remind me of vaginas.
I steal spices from the grocery store. Always.
I like submissive sex. Fuck me, suck me, beat me baby! (Again. Not new information for most.)
I AM too proud to beg.
I tend to talk to myself.
I DO NOT answer myself though. That is the difference between crazy and not crazy. (shutup)
I absolutely will only watch one news channel and one news channel only. I may or may not freak out if I am stuck with some GMA rather than the Today show in the mornings. Being on vacation completely fucks with me in regard to this issue. I like to have the news on while starting my day and when it is some weird looking bitch from another region … it throws me off a little. (shut up)
I am obsessed with 3 key things. Name them. If you know me, this will be easy. If you don’t … well … good luck. Heh.
Say the first thing that comes to your mind after reading the following words:
Snuggle
Heart
Marshmallow
Smack
Colloquy
Perpendicular
Hollow
Marker
Tags: aint to proud to beg, Living Wicked, TLC, wicked
