Embarassing Moments in the Sack.
Nov 7, 2008 Random, Relationships, Sex
I am crazy, but I am going to put myself out there in hopes that you will too. And to gain interesting and humorous conversation. Heh.
Scared?
I was IM’ing with Q this morning and we were discussing things that have happened to us during sex… that were embarassing. The specific topic was BJ embarassment. Having been married for going on 10 years, strange shit has happened on several occasions between D and I, so I am not freaked out easily by random happenings.
So far I have heard:
Cum in hair after gagging… <– this has happened to 3 different people that I have asked.
The infamous accidental facial, which one of the 2 ladies said that it almost blinded her.
Severe nose bleed during sex.
Dirty talk gone wrong: the boy doing the dirty talking got all into it and hit his head so hard on the headboard and had almost blacked out.
A man experiencing anal for the first time with a high sense of smell… lost his erection, and well couldnt ever get it back.
And for mine….
When I was pregnant with Charli my gag reflex was really sensitive. I was giving D head and when he came, it made me gag to the point of puking. All over his cock and stomach. He laughed and I laughed… and I said, “Hey, this is just payback for the time you farted in my face when I was giving you a BJ.”
He couldnt say shit about it. 
Now it is your turn.
Did a situation that makeyou both crack the hell up and the moment was lost?
Dirty talk gone wrong?
It doesnt have to be your story, but if you know of someones experience… share it.
I know there are some out there. Dont deny the world the entertainment!!!
Tags: bj, dirty talk, embarassing, flatulance, laugh, marriage, Sex
November 7th, 2008 at 18:40
this one time…
at band camp…
there really isn’t an embarrassing moment…..an ALMOST embarrassing moment, though, was almost getting caught fucking a male nurse on the hospital admin’s desk by the cleaning lady!!!! lol
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:11
OMG!!!!!!!!!!
LMAO!
November 7th, 2008 at 18:41
OH—and falling off a 4 wheeler and almost rolling into a river.
November 7th, 2008 at 18:41
NOT that I would know anything firsthand about EITHER of those situations……..’ebil, ebil grin’
November 7th, 2008 at 19:12
jesus. LMFAO.
of course you wouldnt. these are totally ‘friends’.
Cassie Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:16
OF COURSE….all about my ‘friends’
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:18
riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
November 7th, 2008 at 19:28
Did a situation that make you both crack the hell up and the moment was lost?
One time I was getting it on with a HOT boxer..well we were kissing and I threw up in his mouth cause I was sooooooooo drunk….YUK GROSS!!
lucky for me…it didn’t kill the moment, but I gotta say that was the worst experience EVER!!
Dirty talk gone wrong?
I used to work for a cyber sex website so all I did all day long was dirty talk..well this one experience in particular cracked me up! I was chatting with a guy that was talking dirty to me and was begging me to take a crap on him (EWWW) so I played along with it and told him I had had corn for lunch (not true)
LMAO…he signed off immediately!! HA HA
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:33
OH MY GOD.
I was trippen about the throw up incident until that. Corn huh? LMFAO!!!!
November 7th, 2008 at 19:32
I’ll think and get back on this one.
The most unusual thing would be my husband getting a mouthful of breastmilk; but I was never embarrassed and he didn’t say anything until we were done; so I guess he never lost the mood.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:33
oh noooooo.
he prolly liked it.
Anne Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:56
Well, he said it tasted like melon, so maybe.
Pervert, he is.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:58
really? was he being funny? like “melons”?
Anne Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:02
No, he was being serious. The best description he could find for the taste of my breast milk was melon.
Which is actually better than it could have been. I once hate a few squares of chili pepper chocolate before breastfeeding and my son wouldn’t go near Cafe Mommy for the rest of the day. I had to pump and dump to regain his trust.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:07
OH SHIT!
It is amazing to me how foods you eat reflect in breast milk, etc.
The human body is such a complicated machine.
Anne Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 10:53
This is true — both amazing and complicated.
For example: Last night, he was having his fun and after several minutes stopped to smack his lips a bit and say, “I think I got breast milk on from this one.” Tis entirely possible. Even though my son was weaned a year ago, once in a while I still catch breast milk coming out if my breast is squeezed just right.
November 7th, 2008 at 19:55
oh my… hahahaha… ONLY reason i’m saying this is cuz i KNOW he doesn’t read your blog. he’d KILL me.. or well… close to it
once, after going to bed and starting ‘playing’… so to speak.. i was on the happy side of a buzz…
he says… ’so… whatcha gonna do with that now huh?’…
a thought crossed my mind and i could not hold it back..
i said.. ‘dress him up in tux and tails and take him to dinner?’…
visual accompanied the statement… and i DIED laughing.. hahahahahaha
Jody Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 19:58
and yes, eventually we got the moment back, but it was a WHILE… cuz i kept seeing ’someone’ dressed up a la black tie and busting out in giggles.
at least he laughed tho… grudgingly… lol
he could NOT believe i said it
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:06
OMG THAT IS HILARIOUS!!!!
I have bust out laughing on a couple of occasions… like if we are in bed and the TV is on, and something funny is said on TV… I will crack the hell up. LMAO
Jody Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:14
I dare you… to NOT think of ‘dude’ in tux n tails n top hat… ‘next time’…. hahahahaha
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:15
i think that would be hot.
maybe it is time for dress up…..
Anne Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:58
Sing “Puttin’ On the Ritz” when you do the visual! It’s the song stuck to mine now.
Oh! and the cane and dancing…. Like Mr. Peanut but much bigger.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:10
definitely much bigger.
November 7th, 2008 at 20:08
Um.
No.
LMAO
I guess cum up the nose…cuz I looked up when I shouldn’t have…
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:14
OH WOW.
On the nose or IN the nose. There is a difference.
LMAO.
PQ Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:18
IN.
Like…I smelled it for the rest of the day.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:19
that is fucking gross.
HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA
PQ Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 20:35
Yeah.
He sent me a text later that day and said “DONT LOOK UP!”
Funny man.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:46
HAHAHAHAHA. OMG.
Sounds like something D would do.
November 7th, 2008 at 20:25
I totally barfed during a blow job once. And the next time after that…I did such a good job that he came in my mouth and I spit all down the front of myself because I was so shocked. What can I say…practice makes purrrrrrfect.
I’m totally a giggler. Like just random things will make me giggle while I’m being horribly naughty. I cannot help myself. I always try and tell them in advance too…so they know I’m not giggling AT them. It’s still embarrassing to me though cause I can’t stop the giggles.
Queef. LMGDFAO. Just that word makes me giggle and then burst out into full laughter.
And…while I never WISH to repeat this or hear it repeated again….I once had a guy that drove me to have so MANY orgasms in a row that I lost complete control of my body and bodily function. Yes, I shat myself.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:48
Queefs used to make me blush so bad. But, how else is the air supposed to come out?
November 7th, 2008 at 20:34
YES. I have been waiting for this one.
once greg and i were having sex in the shower. water was running so he lifted me up against the wall and used the wall as kind of a vertical slip n slide. well it started getting faster, i slipped up the wall too fast and on the come down, i got it up the ass.
i don’t remember after that because the pain was so excrusiating (anal virgin) that i actually fainted onto the shower floor. he thought i was faking, lifted me up off of the floor, laughing. i asked him what happened and then fainted again.
who does that? geez.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:48
O H
M Y
G O D.
ouch.
have you done the anal thing since?
November 7th, 2008 at 21:36
OMG.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 21:49
What?
Jaime Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:02
I’m embarrassed just reading this lol. Sometimes I’m just amazed at how you can talk about sex this way, so openly. I admire it, but I still blush reading it.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:08
Oh babe, I hate to embarrass you.
I dont have reservations about sex. Never have. I dont know why, it is just the way it is.
I hope that maybe if anything, me being so open will pass on to you a bit? I promise, sex doesnt bite unless you ask it to.
PQ Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:10
I can understand how Jaime feels…
I used to be like that but then M broke me. LOL
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:12
LMAO… YEAH HE DID!!!
Jaime Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:13
LOL. I love reading your blogs, don’t get me wrong. Sometimes they are eye-opening.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:20
I always keep you on your toes.
PQ Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:32
In sooooooo many ways…LOL
I keep surprising myself…and him, sometimes.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 22:44
It is called growing into your adult sexual being.
we all end up doing it.
Like a snake shedding skin.
November 7th, 2008 at 23:05
Love the embarrassing moments.. Geesh, I have lots of them however this one readily popped into my mind:
A few years back, I was dating this guy where we had countless HOT STEAMY sex sessions in his office. His office was perfect because it was private yet visible and had a HUGE bay window that faced the lower street side of 45th Ave (UW area) Post Office.
One night we had a late night session which melted over towards the wee hours of the am. Mind you the sex was always hella bomb and the next morning his boss comes into the office to ask a question and had looked towards the window, walked up closer to the window and asked, There is a big smudge what the hell is that?? The janitor needs to be more thorough and went on talking about work stuff
My boyfriend at the time chuckled because it was a perfect imprint that resembled 2 mountains which was the imprint of where he had my ass pinned up against the window.. HAHAHAH, wow that was an embarrassing moment…
LivingWicked Reply:
November 7th, 2008 at 23:10
I wonder if the smell of boodissy had since dissipated.
HAH!
Anne Reply:
November 8th, 2008 at 10:56
Okay…her story was just fucking hot!!!!!!
November 8th, 2008 at 01:22
Sooo…it wasn’t exactly embarrassing, probably only because I’m not easily emabarrassed, but it was HILARIOUS at the time. My hubby and I were fucking (of course) and it was time for him to pull out (our form of birth control). So he pulls out to cum on my stomach and it shoots all the way up to my face and bullseye right in my mouth…We took one look at each other and instantly started cracking up ….later on he told me it was the first time he ever had an orgasm while laughing at the same time.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 21:51
OH MY GOD.
This is the BEST. talk about aim!
November 8th, 2008 at 14:25
The first time that me and my current man had sex we were switching postions and I was in the middle of swinging my leg over and clocked him so hard right in the head. It didnt break us tho, we just laughed it off and carried on with our business. Shit, we were so into each other that we didnt even realize that he had left his bedroom windows open and it had been pouring inside is room and everything was drenched!
LivingWicked Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 21:52
wow. hahahahahah!
November 8th, 2008 at 23:59
I don’t get embarassed…so nothing really to tell. However, I was having sex with this one lady, at her house, with her kids in the rooms across the hall; We were going at it hot,heavy and hard, and a couple days later they were at her mom’s place and her oldest (a 9 y/o daughter) told her mom,”Grandma, I think mommy was sick the other night, because I could hear her moaning really loud…” On another occasion, she (daughter) asked her (mom) if she was moving furniture in the middle of the night because she could hear the headboard banging against the wall. I wasn’t embarassed, but she sure was…:)
LivingWicked Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 21:52
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LMFAO!!!
November 10th, 2008 at 14:50
BWAHAHAHA!!! I’ll probably come back to this one later (even though I’m late). LMAO at all the comments.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 21:53
I still want to hear about yours.
November 10th, 2008 at 20:15
OMG…I’m cracking up at all these stories!!
Mine is pretty tame…dirty talk gone wrong. We were getting it on and he was all hot an heavy with the dirty talk…I guess he got tongue twisted because the next thing he mumbled was “I want to you dick my mouth” I cracked the fuck up!!!!! He was soooo embarrased, I just thought it was hilarious since he was so “macho man”
LivingWicked Reply:
November 10th, 2008 at 21:54
oh shit. heh. a little pinhole in the ego bubble never hurt anyone.
November 11th, 2008 at 01:15
Oh shit I am laughing so fucking hard.
I’ve had several embarrassing moments and moments that erupted in laughter but the one that comes to mind was a couple years ago. I was really getting into the tongue action he was giving me, my whole body tensed up about to erupt into what I thought was going to be a mind blowing orgasm only before I got to that point all the gas in my stomach blew instead. Farted right in his face. Loudly! I fucking died. Right there. I was so embarrassed I couldn’t even get into it again but other than stopping long enough to reassure me it’s no big deal he just kept going.
LivingWicked Reply:
November 11th, 2008 at 01:47
hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!
no fucking way.